Ashton Nichols

(2 min read.)

Fear, a motivator more powerful than pleasure.

In fact, numerous case studies illustrate that the inclination to avoid frightening situations that may cause loss surpasses the attraction to those that cause pleasure.

Experiments with hungry rats revealed that they exhibited faster, more motivated, and more frantic behavior when confronted with something they feared (a cat) than the scent of a reward (cheese).

Biologically this makes sense, and us homosapiens are no different.

We will irrationally jump to action to a greater extreme if it seems something will be taken away from us rather than if it was given to us.

We actively take measures to avoid losses, and have the tendency to preserve what we have over going forth to achieve what we want.

Although easy to understand in theory, why aren’t more people taking risks to actualize their dreams?

Well it’s not so easy to just be ok with losing what you have when going after what you may or may not get.

Fear serves as a signaling mechanism, indicating that the present situation might demand significant sacrifices, even if the ultimate outcome is not favorable.

If you have to sacrifice time, effort, energy, and putting your ego on the line for a job you may or may not get hired for, you will become fearful.

If you have to sacrifice your pride, self-image, and social standing for possibly getting rejected when asking someone on a date, you also become fearful.

After all, if you DO get rejected after asking someone out, you have then lost your pride, became insecure about your self image, and feel embarrassed that you weren’t up to par.

Sounds like a bad deal to me.

But what if we reframe it?

If you asked them out and they said yes, then you would likely become proud, feel more secure with yourself, and receive respect from others for having the confidence to ask someone out and pulling it off. Not only that, but you also have a potential partner for the long-term if things go well.

Now those things sound like a risk worth taking.

Unfortunately, our monkey brains, like the rats, have a hard time rationalizing that in some cases performing the action that brings you fear will bring you something of greater value than what you would lose if you failed.

We are wired to be scared to lose more than we want to win, because in nature, survival is the first priority.

Becoming conscious of this bias is crucial to overcoming fearful barriers keeping you from your desires.

Reframe your fears, make clear your desires, and understand that in the long run, your victories are in direct proportion with your sacrifices.